Trapped

By Shona - Slayer of Five

-------------------------

     That bitch! She thinks it's going to be _easier_ this way. She gave up on him! She doesn't know how good she had it...

     Dammit. There I go again. Not even smiling at a customer...

     "Enjoy your meal, sir!"

     Lying with your emotions again. It comes so easy doesn't it? Trying to sound happy when I'm so worried inside. What will he do now?

     "Konatsu? Please handle the grill for a moment? I'll be in the back."

     Just going. Ignoring his reply.

     Ranchan hates his curse. He's afraid that he's becomeing another person... Loosing what makes him Ranma.

     "DAMN!"

     Stupid flour. Now where's that broom?

     'Sigh...' Bloody curse... Poor pampered Akane can't deal with it being stuck. Shampoo even taking off like that.

     "Yes, I heard you. i'll be out in a minute."

     God I would kill to go soak in a hot tub right now... I wonder if Ranchan's going to stop by to talk. He allways talks to me. I wish I was more than his buddy though... Why can't he see that... I'll tell him! No... It's too soon... He loved Akane but she's all but thrown him out of her life.

     I'll help him find a cure. There has to be one right? There's allways a cure or something and then Ranma will be himself again.

     "YES! I'm fine..."

     Damn... I shouldn't have snapped at Konatsu like that.. I'll make it up to him later.

     Where is my mind today? Too much sauce on this okonomiyaki... Father would have sent me out of the kitchen in disgust by now with how I'm cooking.

     "Yes sir, just a moment please."

     Smiling now. It all an act today. I want to go find Ranma so badly. Noone's heard from him in two days. He wouldn't just run away. Would he?

     There. Another happy customer. The customers are usually happy. They don't have a father who you dissapointed just by being born, magic curses and angry pigs to deal with. On top of it all, a fiancee who's stuck as the wrong gender.

     It's not fair! I just wanted a normal life with Ranma... Not 17 years of hell and dissapointmet! I have to go find Ranma...

     Oh no! Did I say that out loud? How much did I say?? The customers are staring.

     "Sorry, just thinking out loud!"

     Forcing a laugh to sooth the customers and keep them from thinking a mad woman is serving them food. Have to focus! Today's okonomiyaki isn't impressing anyone!

****

     Finally... Closed now.

     "No Konatsu. Would you please clean up? I need to go have a long shower."

     I know he will... Konatsu would anything for me.. I'm not like Ranchan... I can see how he feels about me.. I just wish he would move on. I can't give up on Ranma for him. I'll wait for him to get over Akane! ... maybe he's waiting for me to get over Ranma...

     I really need to do some cleaning up here. Clothes everywhere in my room and here I am adding to the mess on the floor. I wonder where Ranma's hiding... If anyone's heard from him in the last few days noone's talking. Maybe if I gave Nabiki some free meals.. nah.. I should be able to find him myself.

     "Mmmmnnnnn..."

     God this feels good. I'm so glad i found a place with strong water pressure for the shower... It's like a shoulderrub.... I wish it was Ranchan's hands... I hope he hasn't left town... if Akane's driven him away completely I'll go over there and... No!.. no... just think about the water's massage.... Closing my eyes to let the sensation fill my mind... don't wanna think.....

****

     Note to self; Pay more attention in the shower... Bloody small hot water tank... never lasts as long as I want it to... I'm glad I have some good warm blankets to warm back up in... What should I do now?

     It's clear out... The stars are so bright! Even the city lights aren't washing them out.

     "It's going to be cold out." mumbling to myself.. wonderful. Maybe I am loosing it.

     Grab some jeans and a sweater... I'll leave my hair down for now. Hey, there's my heavy jacket! perfect. Gloves, spatula.. Ready to go.

     Always feels so strange to go out dressed as a girl... So much time pretending to be a guy... I can relate to Ranma's curse I guess. he's stuck as a woman. I was trapped in a lie of being a guy. Stupid fathers all around...

     "Konatsu? I'm heading out for a while. I don't know how late I'll be out."

     That worried puppy dog expression. heh.. He's pretty cute sometimes. Bishounen pretty boy. Living life appearing as a woman. The opposite of my own lie.

     Don't even think about Tsubasa! Ranchan. have to find Ranchan.

     "See you..." I'm not even walking very quickly... I really don't know where I should start. Everyone's probably combed his usual brooding spots.

     The school was deserted... But I call to him anyways. Listning for any sign of his presance. Searching the bridge across the river and down the banks. Ryouga was camped under the bridge but he hasn't seen Ranma anywhere.

     Where could he be hiding? Where would no one think to look for him? Wait a minute...!

     The Nekohanten's lights were off. It looks like the building had simply been abandoned when Shampoo when back to China. Everything was still there from the signs to the food in the pantry.

     Breaking the lock on the backdoor might not have been the wisest thing to do, but I have to be sure... There's no sound from the front of the resteraunt... but maybe upstairs...

     "Ranchan...? Ranma?" Gotta be quiet.. Breaking and entering now huh? Desperation is making me do odd things. Besides, if he's here He'll hear me.

     Nothing in Shampoos room... What's next.. Bathroom... Mirror's broken. It's been swept into the corner but not picked up. Maybe Shampoo threw a temper tantrum before they left. But nothing useful here... What's behind door number three?

     "Ranma!"

     He's.. what happened? his hands are covered in rags..

     "Are you okay?? No, no one knows you're here! let me see your..."

     Oh god, the mirror....

     "Baka... I know... Ranchan.. I know... I heard what happened..."

     Gotta get him to the bathroom to wash off his hands. He hates his body so much? He couldn't stand to look at it in the mirror... ?

     "I know... Ranchan... Ranma!"

     He... he looks _scared_!

     "I'm not going anywhere Ranma. I want to help... We'll find a cure for you."

     God he can be pessimistic when he's in a mood like this. I can't abandon him. He's lost everything else in his life over this. He will _not_ loose me!

     "I'll help Ranma! We'll go wherever you want. We will find a way to turn you ba... No! Ranchan! You are you! no matter what you look like and I'm not going to give up on you! Snap out of it and let's figure out where we're going to go first."

     He still looks so sullen. There has to be a way to snap him out of this.

     "Think of it as a challenge if you have to. The curse is _taunting_ you!"

     Wrong thing to say? he froze up... He's angry. I should apologize... No. He's grinning!

     "Right? You'll beat the curse! I know it! I won't abandon you Ranchan. I'll help you!."

****

     Thank god Konatsu was gone. I have to get my own things... He'll take good care of the place while I'm away. he'll understand. i only hope he forgives me.

     I don't know how long I'll be travelling for this time, but I will be with Ranchan every step of the way this time. Maybe he'll start to see me as more than a friend. As long as he doesn't give up I won't give up!

     "Let's go Ranchan!"

Head back to Jessie's Computer